Personally, for the past few months I have been in the hospital recovering following a surgery. Although I still remain in the middle of a long, and strenuous recovery at the moment. I am back – finally with a new installment of my HotMovies column, Rick’s Pick’s.
When I started Rick’s Picks, I intended it not to have any sort of set protocol. Thus giving way for a variety of topics. So when thinking about what subject I would like to cover for this installment, it brought me to a subject that I used to enjoy immensely, when it was booming in popularity, mostly during the early to mid-2000s. This subject being the porn parody. Yes, although the mainstay parody directors are still actively producing the type as we speak, for this installment I bring to you nine of my favorite “go-to” porn parodies. I hope that you enjoy!
1. Batman XXX: A Porn Parody (2010) – Runtime 1 hr. 59 mins. Director – Axel Braun
This parody, released in 2010 from Axel Braun, follows the campy TV adventures of everyone’s favorite caped crusader, Batman (Dale Debone) and his trusty sidekick, The Boy Wonder, Robin (James Deen), in a story fashioned in the manner of a classic episode of the popular 1960s TV show. In this story, Bruce Wayne’s beloved girlfriend, the heiress, Lisa Carson (Kimberly Kane) has kidnapped by the sneaky and scheming Riddler (Evan Stone). After the act, Bruce and Dick Grayson are called into action as Batman and Robin to track down Lisa’s whereabouts. They start by looking for clues at the local discotheque. Unfortunately Batman soon finds himself doublecrossed by a beautiful young woman (Alexis Texas). Batman himself is subsequently kidnapped by The Riddler as well, and is taken to The Joker’s (Randy Spears) lair. There, not only does he come face-to-face with one of his old nemeses in The Joker, but also Catwoman (Tori Black). Together now with Batman captured, the two villains look to take over the world. Meanwhile, Robin and Batgirl (Lexi Belle) come to look for their ally, when, shortly thereafter, they are also bound and tied. Fortunately for the dynamic duo, Catwoman seems to have a change of heart. However, it is only momentarily, after she gets what she wants – both Batman Robin find themselves in danger that could spell the end for our two fine heroes.
Why Was This Film Picked?
When it comes to porn parodies, for me, Axel Braun’s 1960 TV-inspired Batman parody, is as good as it gets. For this one, Axel went all out. This parody is big-budget stuff. Braun was meticulous in bringing this to life, as he was a big fan of the series while growing up. His dedication to the project was so much that the release was put on hold when he felt that the costumes just weren’t accurate enough to his liking. However, with that said, he did eventually get the costumes right, as the authenticity of everything – costumes and all – is to the tee. There are the costumes and props which are spot-on here. However, matching this is the genuine feel of the environment as well as the performances by the film’s dedicated all-star cast. As a film, Batman XXX is highly, highly entertaining, and is one which never wears out its welcome, even after multiple viewings over the course of years. Axel before, and since, has made a plethora of worthwhile parodies, however, this is indeed my favorite, as everything is executed in the way that it should be. I mean, look at that cast – these choices were highly inspired and everyone gave it their all in this timeless pace of dirty comedy. I will always highly recommend Batman XXX: A Porn Parody.
2. Pee-Wee’s XXX Adventure (2012) – Runtime 2 hr. 07 mins. Director – B. Skow
In this porn parody, which reimagines the mainstream hit, Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure, Pee-Wee’s XXX Adventure sees Pee-Wee’s (Tommy Pistol) world turned upside-down when his beloved sex doll he has named “Dolly” (Aiden Starr), is mysteriously stolen from the parking lot of a sex shop. This unexpected development sends Pee-Wee, the childlike man, into a frenzy as he goes on the hunt for the only girl he’s ever loved. This is leading him to things such as: a run in with his enemy, Francis (Evan Stone), a ghostly truck driver named Marge (Evan Stone), an ex-con (Lee Stone), as well as a gang of hostel bikers. This, all before Pee-Wee is led to Hollywood and onto a porn set where a film called “Dollhouse” is being shot. Here, Pee-Wee cleverly goes incognito, as he infiltrates the set where he locates Dolly and attempts to reclaim her. After a bit of chaos, he is successful in doing so. However, in the end, it is Dolly herself whom convinces Pee-Wee that he deserves real love, and coincidentally, real love for him has always been there in the form close friend, and admirer, Lizzy (Capri Anderson).
Why Was This Film Picked?
Pee-Wee’s XXX Adventure is without a doubt one of my favorite porn parodies to have seen and reviewed. Not only is it one that is nicely executed, it is also one which is pretty damn funny, as parodies should be, in most cases. Here, Pee-Wee’s XXX Adventure takes all of the elements from the big-budget feature, and dirties them up to perfection. As you will find here, all the key objects in the story have been replaced brilliantly with sex toys – even Pee-Wee’s most cherished bike. Here, the bicycle is a sex doll, a “Real Doll” brand doll, named Dolly. And when “she” goes missing, Pee-Wee loses his shit. What follows is pretty much along the lines of the mainstream film, only slightly altered for the porn world, and it is great and highly entertaining. Helping make it so is a whole slate of very good performances by the cast. The film is led by Tommy Pistol as Pee-Wee, who gives one hell of a performance. In fact, dare I say it is one of the best performances that I’ve ever seen in a parody – period. Also giving the film a big hand is one Evan Stone, who here portrays a total of five different characters, knocking it out of the park for each of them. The key ladies of this film, Aiden Starr and Capri Anderson, also do well in their respective roles of “Dolly” and Lizzy; Starr as the doll who only Pee-Wee can speak to, and Lizzy as the hopeless romantic close friend of the rebel, and loner, that longs for his love. This is a great parody and is one that I recommend to all. I previously had given this film a five-star rating at Adult DVD Talk. If you would like a more extensive, and in-depth review of the film, be sure to go and give it a look.
3. Peter Pan XXX – An Axel Braun Parody (2009) – Runtime 1 hr. 58 mins. Director – Axel Braun
In Peter Pan XXX – An Axel Braun Parody, Wendy (Keira Nicole) is now all grown-up and married to a crass Englishman named Clive (Steven St. Croix), who is very strict. Growing tired of her home life, Wendy candidly recalls her childhood adventures with the seemingly ageless Peter Pan (Ryan Ryder). She longs for those days of innocent fun – yet to her, they seem so far away. However, little does Wendy know that both Neverland and Peter Pan would just be a wish away, because soon, she finds the redheaded Pan at her window. The two are happy to be reunited, however, Peter comes bearing bad news. It would seem that the dastardly and vile Captain James Hook (Steven St. Croix) has captured the whimsical fairy Tinkerbell (Riley Steele). Peter has come to bring Wendy to Neverland to help them locate “Tink.” Peter Pan’s request is initially met by Wendy with some hesitation, however soon, she agrees to return to the magical land of her childhood. Once Peter and Wendy arrive in Neverland, it appears as though Tinkerbell has escaped the clutches of Hook. However, it is not without consequence. That’s because the Captain declares war on the boy, Pan, with the intention of mounting his head on his wall.
Why Was This Film Picked?
It is actually very simple to explain why I picked Peter Pan XXX – An Axel Braun Parody to be on this list. The film is a phenomenal piece of work that truly is well-executed on a number of levels. First, the realization of the story is just excellent. Here Axel Braun has taken a childhood Disney fairytale, and re-imagined it for adult with both wit and style. This story has all of the trademarks of the original with a healthy dose of sharp, adult humor thrown in. To go along with the accuracy of the story, the film also has production values/production design that is top-notch, this including very nice visual effects by Braun’s own effects studio. As far as the acting goes, it also could not get much better than this. Everyone in this film is quite amazing, I have to admit. In particular, Riley Steele’s Tinkerbell is off the charts. This was excellent, excellent casting. She totally embodies this role. She’s so adorable. We also have a great showing by Ryan Ryder as the title character. Ryder himself is subsequently helped out nicely by Keira Nicole, who portrays Wendy to a very nice effect. Also making memorable appearances are Vicki Chase as Tiger Lily and Tommy Gunn as the Indian chief, “Bigodick.” On the other side of things, we have the villains in Captain Hook (Steven St. Croix, who portrays both Hook and Wendy’s husband, Clive, in the film), and his Pirates, including the sidekick Smee (Jay Crew) and the once-lost boys, Toodles and Nibs (Dane Cross and Jake Jace). There is also a small appearance by Mia Malkova and Aiden Ashley, as a pair of blowjobbing mermaids. Collectively, everyone does a fantastic job in making this film the success that it is. It truly is one of the most memorable parodies that I have seen thus far.
4. Not the Bradys XXX (2007) – Runtime 2 hr. 18 mins. Director – Will Ryder
This 2007 release, sees everyone’s favorite patriarch and matriarch, Mike and Carol Brady (Mike Horner and Alana Evans) working to keep their blended family afloat. Unfortunately, we find that the Bradys apparently fell on hard times, as Mike the architect has recently lost a big project at work. At the present time, Mike says that it may be a period of six months until work successfully picks up again. This is a particular fact that the Brady children overhear in a conversation between their parents. This then sets the kids action. The oldest of the brood, Greg (Benjamin Brat) and Marcia (Hillary Scott) aspire to find jobs – Greg at Sam’s (Ron Jeremy) butcher shop, and Marcia as a figure model. Marcia soon reports to Chatsworth Models, an agency run by a man who calls himself, “Uncle Lu” (Lu Bricate). It does not take her long to realize that this is no ordinary modeling – in fact, it’s actually porno! Meanwhile, the Brady girls (which also includes Aurora Snow and Leah Luv) collectively hope to score additional money by taking up a car wash. In the end, this wild Brady episode of the dirty variety comes to a head eventually, as Marcia’s experience with the sights and sounds of Chatsworth Modeling ultimately inspires her when she proposes an idea to her stepbrother, Greg, that is rather taboo – but regardless it is a moneymaker!
Why Was This Film Picked?
The reason as to why I picked Not the Bradys XXX is simple. At the time that the porno sub-genre was really booming in the mid- to late-2000s, it was Not the Bradys XXX that was the film that really caused the porno parody to truly turn a corner. Not only did it take on a beloved and revered TV series, it also garnered a lot of mainstream attention – even from the series’ cast members themselves. But besides that, as a film, it is one that is well-structured, as well as well-told. The story is one that progresses quite nicely. Also accompanying this is an ensemble of great performances by the collective cast, coupled with a helping of six solid sex scenes, which see the Bradys doing the unimaginable – getting down and dirty! Personally, I really enjoy this inaugural edition, and have done so many times since its release. A series of subsequent sequels followed this particular installment. They are sequels which you are likely to enjoy as well, however it is true that, in my opinion, when it comes to porno’s version of the Brady clan – nothing beats the first!
5. Not Married With Children XXX (2009) – Runtime 2 hr. 13 mins. Director – Will Ryder
In this porn parody-take on the popular cult show, Married With Children, Not Married With Children XXX tells the story of a hard-working shoe salesman named Al Bundy (Eric Swiss) who works his ass off, despite the fact that it would seem that his wife Peggy (Brittany O.Connell) and their children, Bud (Dane Cross) and Kelly (Kagney Linn Karter) do no appreciate his efforts. For him, this is just an everyday occurrence, as his family seems to live only for the next handout. Al is content with this, as it has become commonplace. However, unfortunately for him, things do get worse in the form of new coworker, Bart (Brad Hardy). Bart is an asshole who is always insulting him. Not only that, he has recently began to steer customers clear of Al, and as a result, Bundy’s place of employment has placed him on probation due to lack of sales. It is from there that a discouraged Al plots revenge on Bart, as he plans to use his only daughter’s sex appeal. If he is successful at getting the sexually-distracted Kelly’s attention!
Why Was This Film Picked?
Again, from Will Ryder, Not Married With Children XXX is yet another solid effort from the director. Like the previously mentioned Not The Bradys XXX, with this film, Ryder again closely captures the feel of the source material – and this time right down to the original show’s raunchy brand of comedy. This porn parody is indeed funny, just as I feel most of them should be. It sets out to be funny and it is. The story structure here is nice and feels complete in the end. This is a film that is meant to feel like an episode I believe, and on that, it pretty much succeeds. The casting here seems to have been very inspired, and the performances by the chosen cast, which bring each of the lovable characters to life, are also great. To me the biggest draws here are Eric Swiss who looks remarkably similar to that of Ed O’Neil, and of course, Kagney Linn Karter, here in her breakthrough role. Karter, in particular, is absolutely amazing!
6. The Breakfast Club – A XXX Parody (2010) – Runtime 2 hr. 16 mins. Director – Lee Roy Myers
In this parody directed by Lee Roy Myers from 2010, The Breakfast Club – A XXX Parody, it’s May 21 as we meet a group of five undergrads that attend Shermer College. It is a Saturday morning, however this group, which will eventually become known as the “Fuckfast Club,” have reported to school to take part in weekend detention, as overseen by “Dean Verner” (Samantha Ryan). The students who are all still shocked to find that their college actually carries out detention are soon put to task by Verner when they are given eight hours to complete a two-page essay on who they each think they are. However, despite this, the students – the misfit (Chad Alva), the jock (Levi Cash), the nerd (Sonny Hicks), the pretty rich girl (Faye Reagan), and the outcast’s (Andy San Dimas) attentions soon divert to other subjects over the course of the day. Most of all, sex. And it is through tales of sexual adventure, as well as hands-on experimentation with each other, that these unlikelies bond.
Why Was This Film Picked?
On the surface, The Breakfast Club – A XXX Parody is a pretty straightforward porno retelling of the John Hughes classic. When it comes down to it, many of the mainstream film’s memorable moments are here recounted, albeit in a more dirty way, and played-up sexually, just as they should be. Truth be told, the story progression seen here isn’t great I’d say, but it is the film’s sharply written dialogue that provides it with many a funny moment. Not to mention that the wigs worn by some of the characters are hilarious in themselves. Speaking of funny occurrences, one of the film’s funniest moments comes when the characters are having the candid moment with each other, as they explain how it is they ended up in detention, and as “her Majesty” (Faye Reagan) poses the question, “Who would you sleep with for a billion dollars?”. It is during this, that the dweeb (Sonny Hicks) says that the reason that he is in detention is that he ate the “class banana.” You know, the one that they use for condom demonstration. How funny is that? Very! To sum up The Breakfast Club – A XXX Parody is to say that it is rather enjoyable, there is some really good sex seen here, along with some nice acting by the cast. This is especially true when speaking of Andy San Dimas, who here turns in a superb performance, both in her portrayal as “Ally Needy,” and her showing when it comes to sex. In fact, the round of hard, dirty-talking sex that she has with Levi Cash is indeed the film’s overall best.
7. E.T. XXX: A Dream Zone Parody (2013) – Runtime 1 hr. 42 mins. Director – Jim Powers
2013’s E.T. XXX: A Dream Zone Parody from director Jim Powers is obviously a porno retelling of the seminal 1982 family classic. In this version, Ellie (Capri Anderson) is a young college student who comes face-to-face with an extraterrestrial who has been left behind by its ship. First frightened by E.T., Ellie avoids it. However, her curiosity soon gets the better of her when she lures E.T. inside, using a trail of Reese’s Pieces candy. It is from there that Ellie and her brothers, Ike (Logan Pierce) and Bertie (Bradley Remington) keep the creature a secret from their mother (Alana Evans). It is also during this time that they get to know some rather peculiar things about their new friend, E.T. It turns out that the alien has a sex drive for days, and he also has huge green cock, which glows when he’s excited. In addition to this, he just loves to chug down beers. The more and more time that Ellie spends with her new pal E.T, the more emotionally connected they become. This fact in itself eventually leads to more than one sexually oriented act. This all before E.T., of course, “phones home”.
Why Was This Film Picked?
The reason that I picked E.T. XXX: A Dream Zone Parody is not because it is some great film – both in quality and technicality. No – I chose this one because, no matter how bad it is, it is still somewhat endearing, and overall it is entertaining just because it is so absurd and silly. First of all, like all Dream Zone Entertainment parodies, this film was obviously shot on a budget which was rather low. The film itself consists of cheesy special effects and shoddy greenscreen effects. Yet, no matter how sloppily done they are, E.T. XXX still somewhat manages to faithfully recreate some of the big-budgeted film’s key moments. Other than this, this is a parody which sets out to achieve comedy. And luckily for us, things are so bad that they are good, as the old saying goes. I mean, we have a masturbating alien with a large cock which happens to spout super-goo when it cums. That’s funny. Not to mention that the head of said cock glows prior. There is even a scene during which E.T. has his giant cock sucked and fucked by Jodi Taylor. It just looks insane. Aside from this, the film’s major showing is of course Capri Anderson as Ellie, the alien’s best friend. Anderson is pretty hot in this one, offering a really hot masturbation scene (while E.T. watches and strokes), as well as a nice sex scene with Tyler Nixon. And speaking on the sex, no matter how silly this film’s content is, I must say that the sex scenes themselves are good. All of which feature some hard pounding action by the participants.
8. Sex Boat (1980) – Runtime 1 hr. 18 mins. Director – David I. Frazier & Svetlana
Presented by the often-collaborative directing and producing team of David I. Frazier and Svetlana, Sex Boat tells the story of an all-female cruise ship, and two guys who dare to sail the seas with it. In the film, the all-female boat, which includes a boat staff and its subsequent passengers, exists in story for seemingly two reasons: one, as a way for rich businessmen to do away with their wives as they are away on business, to ensure their significant other’s fidelity; and, two, as a way for punishment. But for the red-blooded American male, it is a melting pot for sex! We’re clued in on this notion, as a driver for a misbehaving rich girl convinces his buddy to go along with a plan that he has cooked up. His idea? To disguise themselves as women in order to sneak aboard the cruise ship. And they do just that. Initially, the two pals manage to keep their secret under wraps while getting a little action. However, soon, the jig is up whenever they begin to make too much motion in the ocean. However, none of that matters when a scheme plays out as a dirty pirate and his men attempt to carry out a kidnapping plot involving the rich girl. It is then that our once-intruders become heroes to all of the sex-starved ladies!
Why Was This Film Picked?
Sex Boat is a fun little classic which loosely spoofs TV’s The Love Boat, though it carves its own story. Admittedly, the story and outcome itself is a little silly. In fact, the entire subplot involving the pirate and the kidnapping really makes little sense in the end, and more or less feels tacked on. It truly does seem to come out of nowhere. However, the rest of the story is exactly how you would imagine it; guys dress up as women, sneak aboard a cruise ship, and chaos ensues as they try to get a little nookie. While it may not be the best film on this list, it is fun and definitely has its moments. The cast of nearly all females is also great, not to mention that Sex Boat is almost a full-on sex comedy.
9. 8 to 4 (1981) – Runtime 1 hr. 16 mins. Director – Louis Lewis
Featuring an all-star cast, as well as being directed by a member of the infamous directing/producing team, “the Lewis Brothers of Detroit,” Louis Lewis, this 1981 spoof of the big screen classic 9 TO 5 (starring Dolly Parton and Jane Fonda), deals with the goings-on of a day in the life of women at the office. In 8 to 4, the focus is on the people who work at the Osborne Insurance Agency, overseen by Mr. Jarvis (Herschel Savage), and Pamela Patrick (Juliet Anderson). We find that the women of this particular office subscribe to the belief that there should be no work without play. Here, they show up late for work, have Xerox room romps (which turn into threesomes), have one-on-one massage sessions, and so on, all while the boss, Mr. Jarvis, brings in potential employees for the sake of sexing them. All of this occurs during one day at the office, leading up to a visit from Mr. Osborne, during which the girls hope to have their bosses caught in a compromising position by the higher-up.
Why Was This Film Picked?
So, why did I pick this title? Simply put, it’s fun. 8 to 4 is a film that years ago, I rented at random. As it turned out, it actually wasn’t too bad. As I said above, it features an all-star cast. One which features the likes of Veronica Hart, Loni Sanders, Lisa Deleeuw, Tigr, and Annette Haven, all of whom look and perform great, both in acting as well as sexual performance. Our main girls are assisted here by the aforementioned Savage and Anderson, along with Paul Thomas and Mike Horner making appearances. Overall, this is another high-quality release by the Lewis Brothers, as they often were. Again, it is some high-spirited fun in the name of parody.
So, there you have it, another cocktail of titles that I enjoy. Some you may recognize, and others you may not. But as always, it’s all about the discovery, and the perverted fun which awaits you!
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