The director credited only as K.P. has partnered with Vinegar Syndrome studios to present the first ever XXX black-sploitation film, featuring Al Poe as the morose handyman named Quasi in the classic feature, Tongue. Quasi is a mute handyman who just can’t seem to catch a break! His woman has left him, and he’s seems to be bullied and abused by everyone he encounters, leaving him alone and deep in his own thoughts, which we all know can be dangerous. Even though he seems to be a handsome man with an easy-going air about him, the adults he’s come into contact with only want to use him for his greatest asset: his nine-inch tongue. It seems that whenever his tongue makes an appearance, people want to screw him, which sometimes works out for the better, but mostly for the worse. Although it’s a classic, this movie isn’t your typical skin flick with plenty of underlying themes in the situations Quasi finds himself involved in. This is true especially in scenes involving the former Penthouse covergirl Brigitte Maier and her nymphomaniac group of friends!
Scene One: Tasty Freeze, Brigitte Maier and Al Poe
The story begins with Quasi (Al Poe) enjoying a sunny day in the park when a woman confident in her beauty waltzes over to strike up a conversation with the handsome man. She chatters away a mile a minute before realizing that the chess-loving man is mute. Embarrassed from the woman yelling derogatory names before storming off, Quasi decides to seek professional help, and that’s where all the kinky and debauched madness begins! Upon arrival to the doctor’s office, Tasty Freeze is the nurse who starts to dismiss Quasi until he pulls out a wad of cash. She quickly informs the slick-talking, wannabe pimp Doc (Dudley Dare) to escort the new patient on back into his examination room.
It’s clear to see that this medicine man doesn’t give a shit about the Hippocratic Oath once Quasi is in the exam room. Judging by his fluttering eyes, deep gasps, and the clutching of his decolletage, Doc Dare can barely keep his composure while conducting the examination… which includes getting his face as close to Quasi’s thick, meaty dick as possible while grabbing Quasi’s ass in his version of a hernia test. Tasty has broken the patient-doctor confidentiality clause to watch the exam unfold through a cracked door. She can’t help but to take notice of the girthy cock as well. However it’s his nine-inch tongue that makes her eyes light up as if to say, “WINNER, WINNER! CHICKEN DINNER!” His tongue prompts her to execute a military-style about-face, run to her desk to call her girlfriend Cherry (Brigitte Maier), and begin to plot on how to get him in their deviously debauched clutches. “Dr. Feelgood” is throwing an orgy later on that week where he fully intends to amuse himself with everything that Quasi has to physically offer. The ever-horny Cherry answers the phone while stuffing a huge dildo in her juicy snatch and quickly agrees with Tasty’s plan once she gets the deets on our poor Quasi.
Scene Two: Brigitte Maier, Margo and Al Poe
Now that Cherry has all the intel from Nurse Tasty, she has set the stage and its time to set it in action! She calls the hung handyman over under the guise of repairing a light fixture that’s been on the fritz while her friend Margo fingers and licks her hairy quim. Quasi soon arrives to the apartment and is taken aback by the sight of Margo diving face-first into Cherry’s juicy cunt. He doesn’t know if he should be there to witness the lesbian love play and is ready to turn tail and run back the way he came—until they both invite him in on the fun. With a big smile on his face, Quasi eagerly snatches his clothes off to dive face-first into a juicy cunt himself! Not to be left out, Margo turns him over so she can gag on his monstrous male member while Brigitte rides his face to orgasm. I would’ve thought Margo would take the opportunity to straddle Quasi’s face as well to get tongued-down herself, but she’s too mesmerized by the dick and is happy simply helping Brigitte suck him off. Being used to current porn, I was a little disappointed that the money-shot was missing from this scene, but being as though this is a classic I knew the action would get well juicier as the story continued to unfold.
Scene Three: Brigitte Maier, Margo and Al Poe
Another day has started, and Quasi tries to keep himself busy with a game of chess while coddling his pet frog. He can’t help reminiscing about the oral threesome he’s had with Brigitte and Margo the previous day. In this case, horny minds think alike. I guess they couldn’t stop thinking about the sex-capade either. Cherry hops right back on the phone with the “handyman” to come and lay more pipe down. He gladly accepts the challenge and doesn’t hesitate to arrive post-haste to render a repeat of the previous raunch-fest. This time around Brigitte gets her greedy pussy drilled in missionary position before she rides him cowgirl style. Since she didn’t get a turn yesterday, Margo takes this time to straddle Quasi’s face for a tongue-lashing that makes her quiver with her climax. She leans over to help Brigitte coax the creamy good stuff out of Quasi’s throbbing tool for a sensational ending that leaves the girls all smiles. Quasi grunts with his orgasm when he finally lets loose and spackles their faces with his manly mortar! If Yelp was around back then I think it would be safe to say he would get raving reviews for knowing what to do with the tools he’s been blessed with.
Scene Four: Brigitte Maier and Margo
It seems that Quasi has begun to fall head-over-heels for these lusty wenches and decides to obtain a beautiful bouquet of flowers for his lady paramours. He starts to make his way to the apartment complex, even though he is harassed by the neighborhood kids who throw water balloons right in his face! Now back then, those kids would’ve been properly chastised by the neighborhood elders and again by their parents once they got home from work. However, Quasi’s not stressed. In his mind, it’ll all be worth it once he gets to see Cherry and Margo. However, once he gets there, he’s in for a rude awakening from his lovesick daydreams. Cherry and Margo are completely clueless to Quasi’s plight as they find themselves otherwise engaged. With hedonistic abandon, these two nymphomaniacs have found another man with a huge black dick to make them pant with pleasure. He’s no Quasi, but his skills at multi-tasking coupled with his eagerness to please makes him no slouch either. Cherry sits on his face for a pussy eating while Margo tickles her tonsils with his throbbing member before he plunges balls-deep into Margo’s bushy beaver! Margo straddles them both while playing with her own slicked slit not noticing that Quasi is taking this all in from the doorway! Embarrassed and humiliated once again, he returns home to engage in further self-reflection. Just when the gray clouds seem to part in the mute maintenance man’s life, he’s thrust back into his depressing world with no warning. We’ve all been a fool for love before, and it seems Quasi is no exception to that rule.
Scene Five: Brigitte Maier and Margo
The night of the orgy has arrived! The party is swinging into high gear. Cherry is clearly in her element as she works the room while dicks are getting sucked and pussies are get licked… and Quasi is at home in a highly agitated state. He can’t seem to shake the thoughts of his misdeeds out of his mind. You see, the reason Quasi doesn’t speak is because he caught his previous lady stepping out on him with another man. In a jealous rage, he eradicates them right there on the beach where he’s found them., leaving him to deal with his traumatic experience by internalizing the event. It doesn’t help that a devious voice is in his head telling him to “come home” while flashes of that fateful day replay over and over again in his head. While Quasi paces back and forth debating what he’s going to do, the camera pans back in on the party. Brigitte is literally working the room, gagging on a thick cock while being drilled from behind while Margo rides a guys cock like it’s the last dick on earth! Groups have actually formed “cluster-fucks,” while other men around the room take advantage of warm, slick fuck-holes (no matter if it’s male-on female or male-on-male action), bringing new meaning to the term “get in where you fit in.” Meanwhile back at home, that smarmy voice has gotten to Quasi. He comes to the heart-wrenching conclusion that he wants to go home instead of indulging in pleasures of the flesh, only to be let down again when he’s confronted by the weakness of the human character. Quasi shucks loose his mortal coil very quickly and suddenly to take the next step in his journey to be forever happy with his one true lady love in the afterlife.
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