We all have our specific tastes when it comes to adult entertainment. I’m of the mind that everyone has fetishes that might be considered fringe or niche, whether they’re aware of them or not (or want to admit it to themselves). Lord knows I have my fair share; some of which readers paying close attention will have learned from my other articles. Some are generally considered tame or more mainstream, and others are definitely not as widespread. But in my near-decade of working in adult, and my decades of watching porn, I never really understood or sought out to enjoy BDSM videos.
Truth be told, it always seemed a little too much to me. Watching people give and receive pain and humiliation (the ‘S’ and ‘M’ in BDSM) on video had no real erotic appeal to me. Intricate rope work was something I could appreciate aesthetically, but it didn’t stir my lust. Leather, chains, and vinyl bondage gear aren’t especially attractive. Quite frankly, some of the stuff I’ve seen over the years for work or just by chance was more likely to make me sneer than pant.
Several people in my personal and professional life, however, are devoted kinksters in one form or another. Some are in BDSM relationships, some participate in their city’s bondage scene and attend kink parties and dungeons, and some just prefer their porn to involve whips and rope and other devices of pain.
Recently, I decided I wanted to try and figure out if I could understand what it was they saw in all of that. Talking to porn stars and filmmakers who are into and film BDSM porn further made me curious. We’re talking about some of the sweetest people you’ll ever meet. They are smart and eloquent and share many of the same interests as I have. People like Charlotte Sartre, Lotus Lain, and Lita Lecherous… or the brains behind fetish studio Severe Sex, Dee Severe, and Jimmy Broadway. They’re good folks and I really get along well with them. So am I missing something? Do I just not understand something? Would I really like BDSM porn if I just saw the right stuff?
Well, with those questions in mind, I thought it might be a good idea to write an article detailing my exploration of BDSM movies. I’ll touch briefly on some of the associated fetishes, too. I won’t sugarcoat anything, and I will report what it is that I find appealing about it. Maybe you’ve had these same doubts and hesitations. I hope that I’m making this a journey for you just as much as I am for myself. This will be like a live diary of that exploration.
The Soft Stuff
So I decided to start with something that I actually know I enjoyed a little bit from my time writing the Monthly Finds column for April: our previous exclusive Step Sister Bound from Digital Sin. I watched the second clip from the movie, starring Megan Marx and Logan Pierce. The narration before the scene describes that Logan isn’t just good with bondage, but also with teasing and taunting. In the scenario, he is so good with all of that that his stepsister Megan is dripping wet well before he ever penetrates her. See? That is hot. And not just that… but also the scene. The up-close ritualized and tender way he administers her collar in the beginning of the scene struck me as sexy in ways I’d never really considered collaring sexy. Have I been so easily swayed already?
This is very light bondage and fetish footage from a couples-friendly studio. It is shot with great cameras in a pretty room with mainstream performers. Yes, Megan is cuffed at her wrists and given a ball gag. Logan dominates, but pretty genteelly. He spanks lightly and does that slapping her cheek while his dick is in her mouth routine, but it’s all close enough to vanilla. If I never get further along liking fetish content, at least I know I like this. It helps that she’s cute and wearing a schoolgirl outfit.
And so I’m moving on to our other softer stuff. We have a category called 50 Shades/Sensual Fetish that is meant sort of more for entry-level fetish. Not that this stuff is not legit (because much of it is), but maybe that it is not as hard-edged or extreme as some of the other content on our site. I sampled Caged 4 from Spizoo. Seeing Janey Doe wiggling around in a teensy leather harness was doing it for me. Mandy Meadows in a leather catsuit and collar was an absolute vision. And I absolutely melted at the sight of beautiful women like Rebecca Vanguard and Jessie Lee sucking cock from inside a cage. There’s something about the idea of a kept woman whose only interest is the pleasure of her lover that I found exhilarating. But the fact of the matter is that this is just fetish-scented gonzo (not that there’s anything wrong with that, but it’s not really what I’d consider BDSM).
Then I tried Restraint from MissaX. Missa’s content hits almost the perfect notes for me every single time… so I figured that she would know how to handle bondage in a way that I could relate to. Her tale of a helpless India Summer in stocks and at the mercy of her stepson was exactly what I needed to understand the allure of domination in bondage—the power and freedom that comes with a (consenting) completely bound person to enjoy at your own pace. It is a really hot movie, and while heavy kinksters might not be so into it, I recommend everyone try it out.
Before graduating to the next level of BDSM, I felt as though I needed a more clinical understanding. So I tried Tristan Taormino’s Guide To Rough Sex 2 to get the 411 from a noted sex educator and some performers in the lifestyle. The scene with Madison Young and Dylan Ryan involved some domination, a little spanking, and some food play. The domination I totally got, and think just about anyone will. Where I disconnected from the scene a little was when Madison was outfitted with a mouth piece that served as a plate and made to sit still so Dylan could eat cake off it. Maybe it feels really good to eat cake from a plate bound to a hot naked woman… but it just didn’t translate from video for me. April Flores and Claire Adams negotiating their scene ahead of the action was charming, and their sensual domination scene was pretty hot (but again, very light).
Madison Young stars again in another scene where she talks about wanting to do pony play. Despite always being into Madison, I found the play silly… which isn’t exactly what you want when you’re trying to get down (though some laughter and fun can make the bedroom much more enjoyable). She says in the intro when asked about why she wanted a hard-bit horse bridle in her mouth, “I get pretty aroused from being uncomfortable.” Pain is something I think I understand more than discomfort. Pain and fear release endorphins which will give you a rush. But discomfort? Maybe it’s like an endurance and humiliation thing? Anyhow, she clomps around in these high leather horse-hoof boots while wearing a leather horse mask and the bridle. Then, when in a bed in the barn she bucks and whinnies and snorts and I just can’t get behind it. However, I personally like fur tail plugs, dog/cat/wolf/fox ears, and painted-on whiskers for reasons I’m completely unable to explain. So maybe it’s something like that, but for the horse-lover set.
The last scene I tried to watch in this movie featured Adrianna Nicole, Chayse Evans, and Mark Davis. I know Mark Davis was heavily involved with Kink.com so I figured this scene was the real deal. And it was definitely a little harder. Adrianna is dommed by both of the other performers and… apart from appreciating how much Adrianna seemed to be enjoying it, this was my first fear that I might not find something in harder BDSM for me. Clothespins on tits? Not for me, thanks. But something interesting did happen watching it for the purpose of this article; I began to understand how something like that might actually feel good in the context of a sexual encounter. Getting pinched is such a sudden jolt and such a severe physical sensation that maybe when swirled around with sexual arousal, I could actually see it heightening the pleasure. So… on to the harder stuff I go!
The Friends
So I figured the best place to start my exploration of harder BDSM and other kink porn would be the performers I already know. What better way to start to understand this world than by seeing it through the eyes (and moans) of the people who you already feel a bond with? And what better way to begin digging in than with a tutorial video? So my first stop on this part of the journey was Kink School: An Intermediate Guide To BDSM from Severe Sex. And after having seen it, I wholeheartedly recommend it to anyone looking to understand the ins and outs of practicing safe and fun BDSM. Aiden Starr, Cybill Troy, Tim Woodman, Jimmy Broadway, and more do an excellent job of providing not just how-tos on flogging, CBT, and smothering. The instruction is thoughtful, and tells you what to avoid and look out for to avoid danger. There is a good amount of emphasis on aftercare. On top of it all, it gets pretty sexy at times… though I must admit that I couldn’t find the pleasure in watching CBT (it just looked painful, which I know is the point). One thing to note though is the sub who works with Aiden Starr, Aidan The Houseboy, made it very hard for me to take the video seriously at first. When he is in his sub-space (the frame of mind that one falls into when receiving pain and humiliation), he purrs out loud like he’s pretending to be a cat. Do your best to just ignore the cat noises and focus on the good instruction that comes with it.
So I moved onto Charlotte Sartre and two of her videos. First I watched her scene in Stepdad Gets Fucked from Severe Sex and co-starring Jimmy Broadway. She dominates Jimmy—putting him in a CBT device and a bridle—and pegging him. Charlotte is really good at being dominant (especially considering how normally quiet and sweet she is), but Femdom just doesn’t seem to have an effect on me. Perhaps it is just a matter of whether you are personally dominant, submissive, or switch-y in your thoughts and daily life as to whether you respond to Femdom or not. Either way, it is worth experimenting with to see if it speaks to you.
The next Charlotte movie I tried was Fucking Machines – Charlotte Is Bound And Fucked In Strict Bondage. Aaaannd I think I might have found my kink sweet spot. Kink.com has long been at the forefront of promoting ethical fetish content. They interviewed Charlotte beforehand about what she enjoys and doesn’t, and about what the plan for the shoot was. She was then put in a number of scenarios involving sex machines. The amount of bondage she is in for each scenarios varies, and it ends with a bondage-free spin on a wheel-driven fuck machine. Watching Charlotte bound and gagged and unable to control the penetration—being helpless in controlling the pleasure directed at her—was eye-opening. Despite the avalanche of orgasms pushed upon her, she only spoke her safeword once… while being suspended in rope and penetrated quickly by a piston dildo. Her safeword is ‘mercy,’ by the way, which is probably the coolest safeword you can utter. Kink.com also finishes their videos with a mini-interview about the performer’s experience; this helps to reiterate that the performers are truly enjoying and are on-board with everything that happened. I love the idea of this being a staple of any harder production (and, really, any production at all).
I then decided to scope out the scene that Lotus Lain said she was most proud of in my previous Performer Roundup. She made it sound more as though it were an endurance contest for her than an erotic scene, so I had to see for myself. Sadistic Rope – Water Torment In Strict Bondage is exactly as advertised. I am new to all this, but I can tell that Dom The Pope does not fuck around. The video begins with rope and a gag and some pretty hard flogging and slapping. The next scenario, Lotus is bound with her feet in the air, and there are some pretty hot moments there where she is being fingered roughly and cannot stop squirting. The scenario ends with a high-pressure hose of water being aimed directly at her pussy, getting her to cum over and over. When it came to the next scenario, she gets tied over a large tank of water. She is pushed in and held time and again, and it is interspersed with moments of being played with by The Pope. Later in the same clip, she is moved to a full submersion tank of water for more of the same. The submersion didn’t translate well for me in any sort of erotic way. It truly is intense, and Lotus enjoyed it, but it probably won’t be everyone’s cup of tea.
I also decided to check out one of Lita Lecherous’ newest titles, Two Caged Girls. Seeing Lita and her sexy shaved friend Rachel Greyhound caged up and bound, naked and in high heels, was pretty exhilarating. When they began to play with each other in the confines of the cage there was something simultaneously sweet and fun about it. It probably helped that the two of them giggle like schoolgirls through the whole ordeal as they try to navigate different sex positions between the cramped space and the restraints. Somehow this video shows the more intimate side of BDSM while at the same time maintaining its edge.
The Hard Stuff
I began with a title from Amator, one of the heavy BDSM studios that we carry. Why? No real reason. I just felt like sampling videos from a few different studios other than Kink and Severe Sex that offered heavy BDSM. I wanted to find something recent that looked major, and that also had some positive reviews to it. So I went with Serious Kit… because I assumed that meant they were describing the equipment and kind of BDSM they were going with. And in that regard I was not disappointed. However, this was the first movie where I felt a complete and utter disconnect. I wasn’t repulsed or judgmental or upset, I just flat out did not understand it. There was some dick-slapping at the very end, so the CBT I understood. There was some electrical stimulation I think (everything was in German), so the electro-play I understood. So much of the video, however, is two very attractive women talking to each other and their sub in a lackadaisical and disinterested manner while the sub is experiencing some severe bondage and breath play. Maybe what they’re saying is sexy or super humiliating and I just don’t speak the language? Possible. But the sub is trussed up in a rubber suit that completely covers everything that his full face mask doesn’t. He isn’t especially vocal and he can’t really move at all… so it’s just watching some tubes and wires connected to a person all wrapped up in rubber. They change his outfit to completely cover his face when they lie him down (he was previously chained to a cross). It looks like a Facehugger from Alien made out of red rope on his mask. Then they slip him into what looks like a bodybag, and then give him a little air through it. At one point they open up a dick compartment and start using an apparatus to suck and pump on his dick, so that part at least made a little sense to me. But otherwise? This is for people that I think have a much better sense of imagination and a thing for breath play. If that’s not you, this will basically just look like a rubber bag with tubes for an hour-plus.
I next went to The Fucking Threesomes by Carmen Rivera Entertainment. I picked it because it was the second most-popular title from the studio. Without reading the description, I dove right in. What I found was Carmen Rivera herself and two other Dommes clad in vinyl getups and packing gigantic strap-on dildos. I mean, we’re talking well over a foot long and girthy. A sissy (typically a man dressed up as feminine as a form of humiliation being degraded) was strapped into a bondage sex swing—ass in the air and some kind of oxygen mask and tube obscuring their face (and presumably breathing). The Dominatrixes took turns just plowing their sissy unrepentantly while marveling at the amount of fluid gushing from their sissy’s limp dick and the size of their sissy’s gaping asshole. It was on the extreme side, to be sure, but everyone was in bright and cheery spirits and seemed to be having a blast. This was not for me, but it is very easy to picture an audience for this video. Anyone into extreme pegging or positive Femdom should absolutely check this out.
The last of the heavy stuff I tried was Casey Calvert Reclaims Her Anal Star from Assylum. I was tipped off by someone that the mastermind behind the videos, Dr. Mercies, had a very unique and funny brand of humiliation. And… truth be told, it was undersold to me. Dr. Mercies is flat-out hilarious. He takes poor Casey Calvert and puts her not just through the ringer, but also makes these really bizarre word association humiliation tangents for her. He instructs her to please his big-dicked orderly. He ties her to two toilet seats on wheels and makes her pick up garbage with her mouth. He keeps instructing her to fly to the moon while he has her in suspension on a bungie with the orderly’s butthole hanging just above her. It is fascinating stuff and, honestly, a little hot. It helps that Casey is just one of the best porn stars in recent memory. But tying in humor and inventiveness with the BDSM and humiliation I guess is the key to unlocking that BDSM part of my brain.
What I Learned
So it turns out that things aren’t nearly as black-and-white as I thought they were. I might be more vanilla than necessary for many of these videos, but I’m not all the way. There is a spark of something in much of this for me, and I suspect there may be a spark of something in BDSM and other fetish videos for many of you out there as well. If nothing else, I feel that I’m much more able to understand where kinksters are coming from—that I can understand certain aspects of their sense of eroticism far better than I could before I sat myself down to several hours of BDSM videos.
It’s also worth noting that I walk away from this much more amazed at what people are capable of both enduring and enjoying. The human body is a mysterious and funky thing… and there’s just no telling what way your wires lay between your eyes and your pants until you’ve explored the possibilities.
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