Werewolf in South Philly: A HotMovies Review

GRRRR! Happy Halloween, ghouls and gapes! Not since An American Werewolf in London, has there been a… Werewolf in South Philly! Long since the Paleocene epoch of the 70s, it’s been a rite of passage for beautiful up and cummers to shed their clothes in service of a schlocky horror film. Before the lovely Cadence Lux was winning award nominations left and right for her work with MissaX, a homegrown Philly-based studio called Philavise cast Cadence Lux in Werewolf in South Philly. Mare of Eastown star Kate Winslet was originally in talks to star, only for scheduling conflicts to pop up, but Cadence really makes the role her own. WOOF!

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“Even a man who is pure of heart, and says his prayers by night, may become a wolf when the wolfbane blooms, and the autumn moon is bright…or something.”

Cadence Lux & Patrick Delphia

One dark, foggy night Cadence Lux meets with Patrick Delphia on the streets of Philaelphia to discuss a horrific encounter… with South Philly. While going out for some wooder-ice with some friends, Cadence also encountered a lycanthrope and she’ll never be the same. She shares the details of that horrific night, and agrees to follow Patrick back home to share another lurid encounter with the monster, which was a tad more hardcore than the first…

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Cadence remembers her second experience as dream-like, almost in a fugue state. A clawed creature caresses Cadence’s peach while she pretends to sleep in bed. After the grope-fest, Cadence gives one of the best on-screen blowjobs of her career. She’s highly skilled at sucking off creatures of the night. Van Helsing and Simon Belmont were never going to get head like this. Blowjobs like this are for bad boys! Due to how resourceful she is with her mouth, Cadence survives her encounter… but is the nightmare really over?

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The effects work was groundbreaking for 2014 and STILL hold up today. The cum splattered on Cadence’s perfect tits looks incredibly lifelike. Werewolf in South Philly is perhaps the best Howling sequel that you’ve never seen. The script and taut direction has its finger pressed against the pulse of that societal fears that lurk just beneath the surface, Ari Aster and Mike Flaningan be damned. Back in 2014, a tiny Philadelphia studio bravely made a production that goes straight for the throat. A follow-up, shrewdly titled A Werewolf in South Philly followed the next year due to a small-but-ravenous cult following, but like most horror sequels, it lacked bite. HEY NOW! A Werewolf in South Philly completely reboots the timeline, but still embraces the narrative of the first film that its desperately trying to distance itself from, making for a rather jarring tonal shift. It’s still worth a watch for CUMpletionists. HOO HAW!

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